Amy White, an American mom blogger and financial advisor, recently posted the story of her first failed marriage on her blog. As it turned out, the problem that the union broke up was covered in the financial component. In her experience, Amy showed how not to live and what needs to be done so that the marriage is long and happy.
Student years
Studying at the university, Amy met a young man, whom she later married. The girl herself and her husband used student loans, but soon began to spend this money not at all for study: it all started with small expenses for short trips on vacation, and ended up buying a car, albeit a used one.
Every day the debt grew, but material well-being did not. Even though both spouses worked, managing loans was not easy. Amy was from a poor family, she was used to saving and monitoring finances, so at some point in time she began to realize that she was being carried into a deep financial hole, which would be very difficult to get out of. Her husband's family was better off, and the young man was not used to restricting himself. Almost every day, he bought something with a credit card. Amy understood that they could easily do without this purchase, but she was very afraid to raise an unpleasant conversation about money.
After graduation
Soon, young people graduated from the university and could no longer count on almost free student loans. By that time, their debt to banks had grown even more, but Amy still could not bring herself to talk with her husband: she worked and gave most of the money to the bank, while her husband spent a lot, but paid little.
Divorce and its causes
Soon after graduation, young people divorced. The reason was a misunderstanding in financial matters. When Amy finally decided to talk with her husband about money, he did not understand why she had been silent for so many years and only now she spilled all the negativity on him. Word for word, a quarrel arose that put an end to their alliance.
After the divorce, Amy realized that the reason for the breakdown was not money, but the reluctance to talk about them. If, then, several years ago, when the girl first began to think about spending, she would find the strength to start a conversation about money, perhaps the gap would not have happened.
Therefore, from the first marriage, the girl made one golden rule: "You can not keep silent about money."
Second marriage
Amy's financial condition improved markedly after the divorce. She was able to repay most of her loans, even took a mortgage to buy her own home.
After some time, she began to meet a new young man who made her a marriage proposal a few months after they met. However, Amy was in no hurry to get married, remembering her previous experience. Yes, young people for some time already lived together, but had different accounts. Therefore, before accepting the offer, the girl agreed with the groom that they would show each other their credit accounts. Fortunately, the potential spouse did not have much debt.
After the young people signed, it was decided to purchase joint housing. Now, after a while, Amy realizes that from a financial point of view this was wrong: it would be much more profitable for them to live in her house, paying a mortgage. Later, this house could be sold, and the proceeds invested in new real estate, using a very small bank loan.
Family life with proper financial management
Two years after the wedding, Amy gave birth to a child and went on maternity leave. This was reflected in the family budget, so it was decided that the girl would work a little at home to pay off the only remaining debt for housing faster.
However, money was still not enough, and then Amy came up with the idea of cutting spending on gifts. Her husband loved to present expensive gifts, which often were not even needed by the girl herself. For example, she likes to shoot from a bow, but she does it rarely, and she does not need a new bow for $ 800. The same thing happened with a professional camera for $ 1,800 and a gun for 1,500.
The couple agreed that everyone would choose a gift for himself, and then talk about it to the other. Thus, the family budget will not suffer from unnecessary expenses, and everyone will receive exactly what they could spend their personal money on.
Among other things, it was decided that a certain amount of money would be laid for any fun. And you need to either fit into it or not celebrate at all. This brought its results: the couple significantly improved their material condition, without denying themselves small holidays and entertainments.
Then it was decided that any possible spending more than $ 100 should be discussed at the family council. This greatly simplified the life of Amy, literally obsessed with financial matters, and saved the family from unnecessary expenses. Each spouse has his own pocket money, money that he spends on trifles like coffee. But for big purchases and food, young people travel together.
Amy is happy in her new marriage. She advises everyone to talk more about money and spending, in order to avoid minor misunderstandings and enjoy communicating with each other.