Today, psychologists are often faced with the appeal of women who are forced to save money, independently provide for themselves and the child, or seek material support from the spouse, because he does not want to actively participate in the financing of his family. Often, women in this situation begin to blame themselves or suspect the husband of infidelity or various addictions that require material costs. In this case, the spouse can use the services of a psychologist or search for information on the Internet on the topic: "What if the husband does not give money?". In order not to aggravate the situation and not provoke separation, it is very important to understand all aspects of this topic, since each man can have his own motives and reasons for such behavior.
Reasons for Lack of Finance
Sometimes a woman believes that her husband simply spares money for the maintenance of his family, but in fact he may have difficulties with the process of earning. Psychologists say: this aspect is very important, since a man can limit his family in material terms only because he chooses the most important and personally necessary areas for him to finance. In this case, the presence of a serious psychological problem, which consists in incorrect attitudes, should be recognized. They block the subconscious and do not allow to go beyond the usual earnings.
With the awareness of the presence of such difficulties, you can visit a psychologist who will identify specific problems and the causes of their occurrence. After hard work and a thorough analysis of all aspects of the lack of money in the family, most likely, problems such as “the husband does not want to give money” or “how to make the spouse support the family” will disappear on their own. A man, leaving his comfort zone, will certainly feel like a different person and is aware of the level of responsibility for the material well-being of his household.
Family and money
Modern psychologists emphasize that men and women have different attitudes towards material wealth. Such differences are significant, therefore it is important to find out and understand them. In modern society there is an opinion that a man should be realized primarily in his career and earn such an amount of money that could fully satisfy the needs of the family. If he is not able to provide for his loved ones, he may feel like a failure and inferior.
For women, it is much more important not the availability of money, but the ability to spend it on the things and objects the family needs. They, as the guardians of the family hearth, prefer to take care of the comfort and practicality of their housing and life, rather than the availability of funds in their savings account. Therefore, when a man does not allow unhindered spending of available finances on objects and things that are stupid and superfluous, in his opinion, the spouse may suspect that the husband is giving money to his ex-wife (if she has one) or to her lover, which he made for his pleasure.
Why does a man lack funds
Quite often couples are faced with the problem of lack of wages, which leads to the fact that the husband does not give money to the family. Psychologists distinguish 3 main reasons:
- The man is not working. Perhaps he lost his job not of his own free will, for example, the reason was the reduction, dismissal, illness or change of residence. In this case, the woman should help her husband again feel like a qualified and necessary specialist, while not demanding money from him or finding a new, higher-paid job.These temporary difficulties, most likely, will not affect the relationship of the spouses and their financial situation. Also, a man may not work, as he is an alpha, has become dependent on something, or simply does not want to work daily. In this case, psychologists recommend not to engage in an independent cure for the mental state of a man and turn to professionals.
- A man can work, but not earn. The reasons for this phenomenon are as follows: lack of education or little work experience, reluctance to move up the career ladder or his irresponsible, frivolous attitude to the work process. Also quite often this aspect is strongly influenced by the presence of a man’s hobby or hobby, which requires regular financial investments or simply his inability to take care of his family’s well-being. In this case, it is possible to correct the situation only with a mutual decision to maintain relations.
- A man can work hard and constantly, but at the same time not give money to the family budget. This happens if he is pathologically greedy, he is not interested in the needs and needs of the household, he has a new woman and children, or he has a serious gambling addiction. In this case, psychologists do not recommend independently determining the methods of influence and struggle with such a man. If the husband does not give money to his wife, but spends it for his pleasure, perhaps the situation will not be corrected.
What if the husband is greedy?
Psychologists say that a woman is able to consider a greedy and overly economical man even at the first stages of meeting and developing relationships. If the partner does not give gifts and does not pay attention to his potential bride, most likely he does not consider it necessary to spend money on this. In the future, such a man will consider that such a life suits his woman and will not begin to change his habits. It is likely that the greedy spouse in the future does not consider it necessary to provide not only a woman, but also children. If the husband does not give money for the child, this is a serious reason to find out the relationship with him and it is possible to visit a psychologist's consultation.
Perhaps the man does not fully realize the need to spend a significant amount of money and therefore does not give out cash to his wife. Favorably in this case, a sincere conversation will act in which the girl can talk about the necessary expenses and agree with him on the subsequent provision of a check or report on the money spent. Although, this fact may indicate distrust between spouses.
Psychological types of male greed
Specialists determine the following types of greed for men:
- Pathological manifestation. Such greed is expressed in the fact that a man does not want to spend money excessively, because he constantly saves them. This happens most often with guys who were deprived of parental attention in childhood.
- Congenital aspects that can be transmitted through generations.
- A manifestation of greed in relation to everyone but himself. A man worries only about his well-being and does not pay attention to the needs of others.
- Selective greed. This may be manifested in the fact that a man tightly controls and limits his family in finances, but contains a lover who is provided with him in the best possible way.
If the husband does not give money to the family, in a short time he will not be able to correct or convince him otherwise. Therefore, you have to make an effort and be patient.
Strategy
The husband does not give money, what to do? This issue excites many women who cannot provide for themselves for various reasons. In such a family, it is very important to have a sincere conversation, to find out the reasons and motives for which a man limits his spouse in finances. If he thinks that his girlfriend is spending cash for other purposes, you can invite him to provide a purchase report. It is also necessary to ask if he intends to make an expensive and important purchase for the family, for which he can save money.If the husband knows all the needs of his family, but does not seek to satisfy them, then he is simply a greedy person. In this case, the woman will have to save or earn the necessary money for her needs.
How to ask your husband for money
Psychologists often turn to girls who say: “My husband does not give money, I'm on maternity leave, what should I do?” For this case, there are several tricks that will help girls easily achieve the desired result:
- It is important to carefully calculate in advance the amount of money that you will need to ask your husband.
- You should approach a man only when he is in a good mood and well-being.
- A large amount of finance should not be excessively demanded, since a man may suspect his wife of deceit.
- When the husband exposes his spouse in a squandering, it is important not to react with aggression or reproaches, but simply to explain why there was not enough money.
- It is very important to remind the husband of the importance and necessity of certain purchases at a certain stage of life.
How to make her husband give money?
If the conversations do not help to rectify the situation and the husband does not give money as before, more stringent and radical measures can be applied. They will help a man understand how hard his second half is without financial support. A wife can limit her husband in food, citing a lack of money. Also a pretty effective method is to send a spouse to shop so that he sees the cost of food and household appliances. Similarly, you can use receipts for utility bills and child care facilities. In this case, the man will understand that his wife is not deceiving him and really needs financial assistance.
The opinion of men
Almost always, men justify their greed by the behavior or character of their wife, who tells everyone that her husband does not give her money. Some spouses unreasonably consider their girls to be squanders or shopaholics. Also, many husbands do not delve into the household needs of the family and think that they are not very important for the fullness of the family. It happens that a man out of jealousy does not want his partner to develop and spend money on personal care. It is often easier for husbands to blame their spouses for not understanding and appreciating them, rather than honestly admitting their psychological problems.
Now work has begun to improve, but will character be corrected? When I think about parting with him, I remember those times when we were happy and when he spared nothing for us!