We encounter manipulations in communication every day: at work, in the family, talking with friends or strangers. Should we be afraid of such a psychological impact? How to protect yourself from manipulation?
Definition of a concept
Manipulation can be called one of the most common types of communication. It is necessary for the psychological impact on the person. Manipulation in communication is a way of control, the ability to control the behavior and feelings of the individual.
The process itself consists of a subject (a manipulator) and an object (the addressee of its impact). Moreover, the latter is not informed about the psychological intervention in his personality. Therefore, such an effect on people (or a group) often has a dismissive or condescending connotation.
Psychological manipulations in communication can be found at different levels: in personal discussion, in the family, in the team. They can be used both for creative purposes and for demoralizing a person. In this, the goal that the manipulator seeks to achieve plays a large role. The methods with which he is going to act are also important.
Types of manipulation in communication
The types of impact are based on using the strength of the manipulator and playing on the weaknesses of the object. The latter, unaware of the process, believes that he controls his behavior. Moreover, all the benefits of his actions go to the manipulator. It distorts the flow of information, finds a convenient moment and in a peculiar way conveys information to the addressee. All these components help the manipulator take advantage of the situation or reaction of the object for their own purposes. Manipulations in communication (types, techniques, methods) - this is actually the control of human consciousness.
The main types of impact are divided into:
- Conscious - a person understands the essence of his influence and sees the end result that he aspires to (this type is more common in business communication);
- unconscious - a person is vaguely aware of the ultimate goal and meaning of his influence (this kind is more common in interpersonal communication).
Minor species are divided into:
- linguistic (otherwise they are called communication) is a psychological impact on a person with the help of speech (during dialogue, discussion);
- behavioral - this is the control of consciousness through actions, situations, actions (in this case, speech serves only as an addition).
What are they needed for?
Manipulation in communication is one of the oldest ways to obtain benefits in a particular situation. This psychological impact is not good or bad. It depends only on the final goal and how to achieve it.
If a person feels that his consciousness is being controlled, you should understand what it is for and try to take advantage of the new knowledge.
First of allshould determine the purpose. What does the manipulator achieve? Is this only a benefit to him? Perhaps its impact will benefit the addressee. This is true in family relationships, when parents try to teach a child to perform an action (for example, exercise). In this case, the goal is to take care of the addressee of the impact.
Secondly, you need to decide on the means. If during the impact the addressee suffers (he is humiliated, afraid, angry, forced to do something), such demoralization completely subordinates the person to the manipulator. But there is an effect with the help of flattery - when the counterparts convince of its attractiveness or uniqueness.But in this case, the addressee does not suffer, but submits to the manipulator almost voluntarily.
Thus, the characteristic of manipulation in communication has a neutral connotation. In it, a lot depends on the personality of the active subject. If the process of exposure is disclosed, meaning is lost in it. Therefore, one should not always interrupt what is happening. Sometimes it’s much more profitable to play along with the manipulator and get your own benefit.
Communication manipulation techniques
The manipulator chooses the appropriate techniques, depending on who his activity is aimed at. It can be an impact on an individual or an entire audience. The media space has its own established ways of controlling human consciousness. Employers often use manipulation techniques to create their own image. In the family, there are separate forms of interaction between parents and children.
The basic techniques and methods of manipulation in communication are based on feelings. They are able to destroy a person’s personality, his life. Therefore, you should learn the important points of mental interaction and try to stop them.
Exposure to love
In this technique, love is not an unconditional feeling. A person is perceived only if he fulfills certain requirements or conditions. For example: “If you do so and so, I will love you”, “Only worthy employees remain in our team, the rest leave of their own accord”. In manipulation, conditions are offered, if they are fulfilled, a person will receive at least a good attitude toward himself, and at most - love. The cruelty of this psychological impact is that the person is not perceived entirely (with advantages and disadvantages), but only approve of its good behavior.
Exposure to fear
Fear and lack of awareness of the addressee allow cleverly manipulate his actions and deeds. For example: “If you don’t go to college, you will become a beggar”, “You are an excellent specialist, but another job applicant has appeared on this vacancy.” All invented fears come from a lack of information. By listening to the manipulator, the addressee makes a big mistake. Sometimes such an influence hides a desire to make a person do something better, without additional motivation or funding.
Impact of Guilt
Guilt is most commonly used by manipulators in family life. By experiencing it, a person seeks to repair the damage done. For example: "You walked and had fun with your friends, but I am alone and have a baby to babysit, and I create comfort for you", "You better relax today, but I can do your work for you." The manipulator will constantly put pressure on guilty feelings or find new episodes. In such a situation, the addressee will try to neutralize the discomfort and will fall into the same trap over and over again. Guilt subsequently gives rise to aggression, therefore, the manipulator should use such psychological influence with caution.
The impact of self-doubt
In this case, the manipulator crushes its authority. It directly indicates the incompetence of the addressee in certain issues. For example: “You must listen to me - I have lived my life!” You are not capable of anything without me ”,“ Actually, I’m the boss here, so it’s up to me to decide how this should be done. ” Such self-affirmation at the expense of another can take place at different levels and on different issues. The impact will continue until the addressee gets rid of his insecurity, weakness and acquires the necessary skills.
Exposure to pride
Vanity, pride - a wonderful lever for psychological impact. For example: “I see that my wife is tired at work. But you are smart and an excellent hostess - surprise my friends with a delicious dinner ”,“ I am preparing a promotion for you, but, unfortunately, I still have to leave my salary the same. ”The more a person seeks to prove his skills to someone, the more often he tries to catch up and overtake his acquaintances in success, the faster he will become a victim of psychological impact.
Exposure to pity
This technique is often used by children and young girls. His task is to arouse self-pity and a desire to help. For example: “I’m so tired, I don’t have any strength, but I also need to cook dinner for you”, “I’m the boss and every time I get statements for your bad work and pay fines for you.” The victim in this psychological impact receives help. But she herself does not seek to improve her life, but prefers to complain. The light energetic “vampirism” of this action subsequently causes contempt for the manipulator.
How to learn about the psychological effects?
There are different ways to communicate. Manipulation is one of them. But how can an ignorant person understand that he is being bred into feelings or trying to push him to a certain action? There are special keys that the manipulator uses to get the result. Here are some of them.
- Emotions. If the addressee feels that the opponent is “crushing” feelings (for example, pity, empathy, shame, revenge), then the process of managing consciousness is underway.
- Incomprehensible words. Professional terms, “smart” phrases appear in speech. They are a distracting maneuver that is designed to disguise a lie.
- Repeat phrase. The recipient hears the repetition of the same statement in speech. Thus, the manipulator is trying to "zombie", inspire the necessary thought.
- Urgency. It creates a certain level of nervousness. The addressee does not have time to comprehend what has been said, but he is already being called to action. His attention is distracted, and in the hustle and bustle he begins to do what the opponent wants.
- Crushing the meaning. During the discussion, the recipient is not given all the information. It is crushed into pieces so that a person is not able to cover the entire news as a whole, but draws false conclusions based on a fragmentary phrase.
- The imposition of stereotypes. The manipulator deliberately addresses known truths, emphasizing the commonality of the addressee with them. This imposition of stereotypical thinking or actions leads to the fulfillment by their object of influence.
Manipulations in communication are necessary in those cases when a person does not have the strength and confidence to achieve his desire. He is afraid to openly declare his claims and will prefer to seek his hidden influence.
In business relationship
Manipulations in business communication, their presence or absence, are more dependent on the professionalism of the employee and his self-confidence. It is difficult to influence a person who knows his own worth. If the employee is incompetent or too shy to emphasize his dignity, the employer or colleagues will not fail to take advantage of this.
Common methods of exposure in a work environment are:
- taunts, reproaches; the addressee is nervous, annoyed, and performs the actions necessary for the manipulator;
- demonstrative insult - unwillingness to admit their point of view is incorrect, and the addressee will try to fulfill all the whims of the offended;
- flattery, support are called upon to reduce a person’s vigilance and make him a victim of exposure.
Manipulation in business communication can be avoided if you clearly express your opinion (obviously correct), be confident in your professional qualities. During exposure, you can try to interrupt the conversation by phone call or urgent matter. Even a simple change of discussion topic will help to avoid manipulation.
In interpersonal relationships
Manipulations in interpersonal communication are most often based on gender. This factor allows the use of stereotypes of behavior (“All women do this”, “Real men do not do this”).
Another option is to provoke a desire to protect your gender affiliation (“You did everything right, this is the act of a real man”). The success of the psychological impact directly depends on the arsenal of means and the ability to use them in different situations.
In family relationships
The most common family manipulations are tantrums, silence, a demonstrative departure "to my mother", parties with friends, binges. The psychological impact is used by both parents and children. This is a way to get profit by playing on the feelings of others.
To avoid such influences in the family, it is worth learning to trust each other and openly discuss their desires and actions. Perhaps at first conflict situations will be a frequent occurrence. Over time, relatives will learn to calmly talk about their goals and motivations. But there are constructive manipulations that can inspire a spouse or child for new achievements.
How to protect yourself from psychological effects?
Protection against manipulation in communication primarily consists in avoiding the manipulator. Contact with a person should be minimized or, if this is not possible, try to turn off your emotions. If you don’t make decisions hastily under the influence of other people's words, but think them over, then this will help reduce the intensity of the psychological impact.
The desire to manipulate is most often a hidden desire for power. Praise or appreciation will force a person to reconsider their ways of interacting with people.
You should also try to keep your distance, not to notify the manipulator about your life and its details. The more he knows about the addressee, the more he will get ways to influence.
One must learn to refuse. It is better to be known as a callous person than to constantly perform someone else's work.
Manipulations in communication and their neutralization are common phenomena in society. Therefore, you should always remember that everyone has the right:
- on mistakes and own opinion;
- to change your mind, change your mind;
- do not answer questions if they seem incorrect;
- to be yourself, do not try to be attractive to everyone in a row;
- to be illogical.
